I haven't even gone back to figure out what week i am on again, i have lost count. i put on two pounds i think.. maybe 3.. and i started to panic. so i have started tracking again today. I am still down more than 15 pound. that really doesn't sound like much, but do you know what it equates to? It means that when i put on last years capris and shorts, as i am pulling them up my legs, cringing, waiting for them not to fit, to have to fight with the zipper, to jump and cry and get angry. It means that when i pull them up, pull up the zipper and do up the button. they fit. beautifully.
Every time i pull out an old pair from last summer, i hold them for a minute. close my eyes and pray to God that they will fit. I hadn't realized that i do this all the time. It isn't a happy place to be.
What is happiness? it is knowing that they will fit, and might even have a little bit of extra room.
So i am tracking again. because if i lose more, maybe i will lose the dread that comes with shopping and realize you aren't the size you thought you were, you need the next size up.... again. i want to like shopping.
ya ya, i know.. shut up already ;) you will get my numbers later.
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